Sounds of the End…

This day I hear a different song, one that’s low and robust as it hums,

I hear it from within as if it beats for me, but somehow I know it is not of the heart,

This song that permeates right through me, with lovely, vibrating and attacking drums,

So natural, so clean I can hardly pretend I cannot hear it – as its rhythm slowly pulls me apart,

My sugared façade wilts like onion skin as I listen and hear the sounds of its truth,

The sticky dreams and fantasies that have held me together cannot resist my unclothing,

Reinforced they were by the love I had for you, feelings that swelled the more they were refused,

Now exposed rather awkwardly at the very core of me like the pips of a ripe melon un-supposing,

That’s where you once were – before I heard this song – back when you were my only music,

When folly ruled and I truly believed you were here and could see me and want nothing more,

I had eyes for you only – lonely – I tried time and time again with the strength I had to prove it,

And all that did was fill me with fear and despair, and everything I thought I knew suddenly unsure,

Hollow and uncared for my world became chaos, my negligence leaving my very self in the quagmire,

I reached out to you but all I found were cobwebs and the echoes of my own sad and endless whimpers,

For a while I ignored my own voices, believing what I wanted and dancing to your tune – so inspired,

Pretending it didn’t hurt as if things would, could and probably should have got much better and simpler,

But all there was in the end was the empty, the pit of sorrow that welcomes the sound of change,

It feels like an awakening, a certain twisted acknowledgement, if only by me – undoubtedly for me,

And I sway to it like a ghost in the mist – a whisper in the wind – letting it bear me with its range,

As I move with nothing else more to lose, only certain that of this love I am free…

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4 responses to “Sounds of the End…

  1. Ah, I love this “For a while I ignored my own voices, believing what I wanted and dancing to your tune – so inspired,

    Pretending it didn’t hurt as if things would, could and probably should have got much better and simpler,” Doesn’t it always seem that way when looking back?

    It seems that you have found a place of peace with something….of freedom. Greatness. 🙂

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